They are in free-fall. The Tories and their robotic repetitive weak and unstable leader are dropping like wee troublesome aliens hiding in tall tripod machines in an HG Wells novel about the hazards of the common sniffle.
Somebody has pressed the start asking Tories awkward questions that they cannae answer by just repeating the standard ‘we need a strong and stable leader to go in to the Brexit negotiations’ button in the media and it’s done them in good and proper.
The response yesterday from Theresa May when asked by reporters why she wasn’t attending the latest leaders debate, which JC decided tae slip into at short notice, was telling.
She stuttered, did that disconcerting awkward shaped mouth thing she learned from watching too many Gordy Broon self -motivational DVDs and imploded. An almost classic 10 out of 10 curl up and burst moment, rambling on about how many times Jezza is on the telly, how she likes to speak to ordinary real people (the same ones everyday) instead of debates and making a cheerless quip about why Corbyn didn’t attend the previous debate. She really is becoming a liability to the Tories. What a beamer.
If you haven’t seen the clip yet check it out, it’s not hard to find. Then having watched it ask yourself this question, would you trust this woman to sit in a room with the leaders of the EU, and rely on her imagined charisma and self-overpromoted razor sharp negotiation skills to achieve anything other than a disastrous outcome to the whole sorry mess which is Brexit? No, me neither.
Then we’ve got her henchman Davis, all sunken eyed, sweaty and exhausted looking as Krishnan Guru -Murthy, normally a fairly mild mannered, easygoing and cheery soul, not of the Andrew Neil or Paxman bullying variety, tore him a new blowhole in which to stick his glorious 2nd coming of the empire Britannic flag.
The interview was declared a no-contest as Davis was pummelled around the chops on why is it that the Tories just go around all day telling lies, and why is their leader feart to debate her policies.
Next up Amber Rudd, a ruthless future Tory leader in the making if ever I saw one, whose withering fizzer would turn the jam on your toast to molten lava at the very mention of the words disabled or not fit for work, drops the ultimate clanger.
When asked by the moderator, during the televised leaders, leaders of the party in the House and designated hit-women debate, why her party hasn’t provided much in the way of costings for their manifesto plans, she asked that the Conservative and Unionist party be judged on their record, resulting in the audience bursting into laughter like she’d just given them a ten minute stand up routine, and the Daily neo-fascist gazette screaming biased left wing audience all over their front page in that alternative universe style that Mail readers live in.Hilarious stuff.
Aye ok Amber. We’ll do that. That’ll be record Foodbank use, uncontrollable national debt rising under the Tories, the rape clause, the dementia tax, Lazarus-like health examinations made by private companies that your colleagues have shares in or directorships of, hired to get the frail and disabled out if their houses just long enough to collapse and die whilst stocking shelves in a supermarket on a zero hours contract, or force them instead into taking the decision to end it all themselves rather than living with serious illness in destitution, and much much more. We’ll judge you on your record alright.
Following Michael Fallon’s folly of earlier in the week, and other gaffes, the procession of Tory MPs running headlong into brick walls would almost suggest, If we didn’t know already that it’s just because they are a bunch of incompetent wankers, that they are trying to nobble themselves in this election.
If things get much worse for them there’ll be multi-millionaire part time government politicians ducking for cover into their hedge funds, campaign guru Sir Lynton Frisbee will be quietly checking out flight times on last minute deals to Sydney, there’ll be rumblings on the back benches (John Redwood has always given me the shivers) the forty-faced power grabbing will start again and Cabinet meetings will resemble the aftermath of a Game of Thrones wedding.
One week out, and all to play for down south. Project Fear is going to hit warp factor 5 to win it for the rightest of right wing Tories. Jeremy Corbyn, and his supporters, are just about to fully understand how we advocates for an independent Scotland felt in the days after the poll in September 2014 put the Yes Campaign ahead 51% to 49% as time shortened towards the referendum hour.
And whilst all of this is going on what is Nicola Sturgeon doing, having left the TV debate appearance to the very able leader of Westminster’s Scottish MPs Angus Robertson?
She’s out campaigning for her colleague Stephen Gethins in Anstruther, getting her teeth into a good fish supper and a pickled onion (arch Tory, who is most definitely a Tory, Ruth Davidson avoids the latter as her standard facial expression does not require the additional aid of a pickled onion).
That was, at least, until the nearby school came out for lunch and the First Minister of Scotland found herself being good-naturedly mugged by passing hungry teenagers clearly after her chips.
Strong and stable? Men and women of the people? Being warm, genuine, honest, intelligent and compassionate is all that is required. Nicola Sturgeon has these qualities in abundance.
It’s got to be vote for the SNP next Thursday for a say for Scotland in its own future. It’s the only option.