So, here we are again eh, we’ve aw seen this before, Groundhog Year. Old School imperialism is flexing its muscles once more.
Anxious to take away the focus,and dilute the sting, from any domestic issues which might be coming up in the near future (like his impeachment trial) the biggest wean on the planet has thrown his rattle oot the pram again (tied tae a drone loaded with things that go bang)and has, with malice aforethought, parted an Iranian military leader the general public has never heard of, from his capacity to breathe, permanently, whilst on a visit to Iraq.
In doing so the giant blimp-like wean has succeeded in further cementing the relationship between Iran and Iraq,who up until fairly recently spent years knocking lumps out of each other, now united in a common cause against the west, very possibly one of most poorly judged strategic moves ever made by a leader of one of the superpowers, which will once again cost many innocents their lives, and cause untold misery for hundreds of thousands of others.
His pet Shih Tzu, hair akimbo, after his Crimbo hols, has managed to regain the power in his rear legs, and is back upright, his girlfriend having prised her laptop out of his hands again. The gin bottle is safely hidden away, and the island of Mustique is just a blurred memory (it took four aides and a crowbar to get him out of his red palm tree designer beach shorts).
Caught unawares by his imperial master’s impulsive actions the blonde buffoon is a bit confused as to whether he should currently still be advocating the mass chucking of tins of Murican chlorinated chicken out of the backs of lorries at ordinary working people going about their daily business in the UK, or be proselytising to those same people that we should be firing tins of Murican chlorinated chicken out of Howitzer heavy artillery cannons at ordinary working people going about their daily business in the Middle East. I’m sure he’ll work it out soon. What a shambles. It won’t be good.
Meanwhile it has become clear how Scotland’s rightful return to self-determination can be achieved with very little fuss or disruption.
As we know, the First Minister of Scotland has recently published a document asserting the democratic case for the people of Scotland to have the right to make their own choice about their future governance, without interference from Westminster.
In tandem with this she has formally written to the Prime Minister of Britain(see England) as is considered customary, seeking, under section 30 of the Scotland Act, to transfer powers currently held in London to allow a referendum on self-government to take place.
Clearly the position taken by the previous occupant of 10 Downing Street, who didn’t even have the good grace to acknowledge a previous such request during her premiership, is unsustainable in the face of the current overwhelmingly blatant democratic deficiency which exists in the political relationship between Scotland and England.
At some point soon, in the middle of random half quotations in Latin. and general guffawing, England’s Prime Minister is going to have to say “Nec, nostro salus cara sit unio Anglia!”(which roughly translates as feck off Scotland, you are not having a referendum, we need your dough, your resources, your assets, your exports and your strategic position as a buffer to any risky atomic leaks or potshots at our leased American war toys).
When he does this there’s a very simple response available. Get Golden Globe award winning Dundonian actor, and advocate for Scottish self-government, Brian Cox, to make an announcement at a tv and film awards ceremony.
Brian can publicly announce that we’ve played nice, we’ve complied with every rule, written and unwritten, we’ve acted in accordance with the constitution of the UK, even though there isn’t one, we’ve been polite to a fault, we’ve been patient beyond any reasonable judgement of patience, but now, all bets are off.
He can say that as of midnight that particular day Scotland will consider itself to once more be an independent, outward looking, internationalist country, which will be seeking to retain or achieve swift membership of the EU.
In his fine Dundee accent he can add that Westminster’s treasury is getting nothing out of Scotland, hee haw, the middle of a doughnut, tax revenue, Scottish exports from English ports, nothing, until negotiations are completed on an amicable split of the union’s assets and resources.
Yes, we should do that. We can guarantee then that none of it will be reported. We’ll be completely ignored, blanked, like the bold Brian, yesterday, by the state broadcaster and co, the Hootsmon, the Herald and the English semi-fascist media.
When it eventually does hit them that something is awry, and someone in Downing Street complains that we never told them, we just have to say that we sent them notification in the post, just like they did when they triggered Article 50 of the Treaty of the European Union, to start the mad Brexit divorce saga off. But like their notification to us, it must have got lost. Fairs fair after all.
In all seriousness we need to get moving folks. There is no viable alternative (if there is I’d like to hear it) to us convincing more of our friends, family and colleagues of the benefits of independence and the urgency of the need to achieve it, to create a majority, an overwhelming juggernaut of the combined will of the people of Scotland to take decisions into their own hands.
Independence is normal, being governed by another country is not.