Nae wonder the famed big hairy borders fermers attending Scotland’s rugby international in Paris, who were jammed up David Mundell’s nose by a wee wummin in the audience on Glasgow’s Question Time a few weeks ago, are voting Yes this time.

When you consider the (lack of) in-depth, considered analysis and preparation for the upcoming Brexit negotiations being carried out by Theresa May and her government, particularly Brexit Czar David Davis, once again exposed as arrogant incompetence in front of a Commons select committee yesterday, I think there will be very few fields surrounding Scottish farmhouses displaying ‘No’ banners this time during the run up to ScotRef.

What the hell are the Tories doing? Are they trying to sabotage their own country? Following weeks of throwing strong hints out in the media that it wouldn’t be so bad if negotiations with the EU break down, which will actually happen once they start making Empire 2.0 mentality demands of the 27 remaining EU members with very little bargaining room, and being in no position to demand anything, David Davis admitted under questioning yesterday that his government has made no assessment of the likely effects on the UK economy of a no deal situation with the EU. Wait for it. He’ no’ promising anything but he thinks he might know a wee bit more perhaps in a year or so!

What have they been doing all of this time, apart from blustering, stalling and ignoring ‘equal’ partners who have actually considered the future and made some proposals to try and ensure an economic firestorm doesn’t rain down around the heads of the people of Scotland, and our friends in the rest of the UK?

Has Davis been sitting picking fluff out of his belly button for 8 or 9 months, or perhaps he’s been perfecting making farting noises by pumping his hand under his oxter? Dear oh dear. How blinkered and one-tracked about stopping immigration are these people?

The big hairy fermers must be suffering sleepless nights considering the fact that when these eejits walk away, red faced, from a room in Brussels full of giggling thigh-slapping EU partners, with their red, white and blue tails between their legs, and nothing in their pockets but the middle of a doughnut, the UK, in whichever form it will be then, will become subject to World Trade Organisation tariffs, the avoidance of which is one of the main reasons of being in the EU in the first place.

The big hairy fermers will be sweating, as we all should be, that, for example, UK producers of dairy and meat would be up for tariffs of up to 40% to sell their products abroad.

Significantly passporting rights for the UK’s financial service sector are set to go, he admits, but is not sure, he thinks. This will be catastrophic for Scotland’s banking and financial services industry.

We might want tae consider too, as Davis confirmed, but again, worryingly, hadnae really thought about, that once the EU becomes a memory for ‘Brits’ your two weeks in Majorca or Benidorm, or if you are a British citizen living in Europe, will get a damn sight more expensive should you take no’ weel whilst there. Free or subsidised health care for Britons in Europe will be going right out the window. That’ll be a nice little earner for your host nation, and they’ll make sure it’ll not be cheap.

It’s going to get dearer to get there too. Best start thinking about two weeks in a B&B at Whitley Bay or Millport from now on, it’s back to the good old days for Brexit Blighty, with the ending of the ‘Open Skies” agreement, which has slashed airfares across EU nations, but hey, none of those pesky immigrants will get in, so that’s alright then.

It was interesting to hear the response from the under pressure Davis to the posit that the UK could walk away from any financial liabilities or commitments, and ‘not pay a penny’ to the EU if a deal favourable to the UK is not reached. “Interesting” he says ” a good start in this exercise,” Aye vey good, we’ll remember he said that when it comes to Scotland picking up a share of the UK’s liability for the high speed train line upgrade that stops before it reaches Scotland, and repairing the palace cludgie, as we climb onto the lifeboat of self-government.

David Davis reckons ‘ the path will become clearer once negotiations get underway, when we finish building the Lego blocks, we’ll build the house.”

Do you feel reassured? Ooft! Mibbees that’s what he’s been doing all of this time, playing wae Lego. He’s probably built a nice wee replica of Tower Bridge and Big Ben during the last eight months. At least he’s no’ wasted his time.

There is an old saying from Honest Abe or Mark Twain which states ‘ It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt’. Every-time any of Theresa May’s Brexit team speak on the subject they reveal that this quote is most certainly accurate. Frightening stuff.

Scotland will be oh so much better as an independent country.


One thought on “Clueless

  1. Absolutely spot on Ally. I’ve yet to watch Dai Dai’s performance in front of the Common’s Select Committee but by all accounts it’s a doozy. For a Minister whose sole portfolio is to Brexit US – aye US -out of the EU, his grip or understanding of the brief seems woefully wanting.
    I’m off to watch it just now. My box set of Laurel & Hardy has reached its conclusion I think. I hope Dai Dai isn’t in black & white; I want to be able to tell the difference.


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