Union at all costs Kez

Pure stowed oot it was on its first day, in a hall in Perth, for the opening exchanges of the Scottish Branch New/Old/ Not Really Sure/I like Corbyn/ No I don’t/ Bring back Clem/ We love Tony/ Labour Party.

it is clear that organisers have hugely under-estimated the popularity of this great formerly progressive movement for inertia, and there are no’ enough seats tae accommodate the massed ranks of former socialist foot soldiers desperate tae hear their only member of Westminster’s parliament from a Scottish constituency tell them that half the voters of Scotland are wrong, and that his party is the party of devolution, therefore let’s create a new contract with the entity we are devolved from, that has pumped us dry for centuries, to ensure that we can’t get devolved any further.

Joy of joys. Tune in on Saturday tae catch the most perfectly clear politician of perfect clarity, the beloved leader of this hapless band, again making it clear, crystal clear, that she is from the party of devolution, but will pledge to work tirelessly in support of the Union ‘if’, (‘when’ Kez) the second, and decisive, campaign for an independent Scotland commences.

The party she leads will never support independence says Kez. If she has a close look around about her she might notice that this is the reason that there are a lot of empty seats in most of the venues she makes her crystal clear clarity speeches in. Tumbleweed time Kezia, tumbleweed.

The redux reheated Gordy Broon bawbag without portfolio federalism Vow isnae going to fool anybody, not even the remaining poor sowels who cannae bring themselves to rip up their membership cards.

The theme of this weekend’s conference is ‘Together we’re stronger’. I would suggest it would have been better described as Together we completely lost our way.

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